K

Kain, Karen

Aristocratic and once beautiful, now merely glamourous in an upper-class Anne of Green Gables sort of way. If she'd come of age ten years earlier, married Glenn Gould instead of Ross Petty and had about five children, Canada would be a better place and Kain would have been an even more extraordinary dancer. Now condemned to doing farewell tours until she's well into her 70s.

Kates, Joanne

Toronto restaurant critic so secretive about her identity that even close associates aren't sure she's not former Ontario Tory cabinet minister and current TVO head Isabel Bassett. Being from Toronto, Kates wouldn't know a good Japanese restaurant from a tractor-trailer truck even after it backed its duals over her limousine.

King, Mackenzie

Canadian Prime Minister 1935-51 who guided Canada through WWII by consulting with his dead mother and discussing economic and foreign policy with his dog, thus setting the bar for Prime Ministerial levels of intellectual penetration during the 1980s and 1990s.

Kingston

Beloved of Don Cherry, birthplace of Doug Gilmour, Kirk Muller and the Tragically Hip, site of Canada's major criminal holding tanks, point of origin for the Harrowsmith lifestyle, and home to every gardening writer east of the Rockies, most of whom have recently lost their jobs to corporate American buyouts, and are moonlighting as folksingers, intellectual lesbian therapists and prison guards.

Kinsella, W.p.

American writer and Indian fighter, but such a big fan of Canada's Medicare system that he still resides in Canada. He was elected to the Order of Canada for his loyalty to Canadian values, and for believing that heaven is somewhere in Iowa. Kinsella writes, ad nauseum, about baseball despite the handicap of only having handled a baseball for the purposes of having publicity photos taken, but has had considerably less success writing love stories or having successful relationships with women under 200 pounds.

Klein, Ralph

Alberta Premier, former open mouth radio host and all-round fiscal butt-kicker. He became a corporate culture hero by exporting homeless and other disadvantaged Albertans to other provinces and is one of the spiritual beacons of CCRAP for his attempts to transform the federal income tax structure into a facsimilie of the tax system practiced by Imperial Rome in 100 A.D

Kroker, Arthur

Michel Foucault meets Wired magazine. Any more than five of this Supermind's sentences in a row will give even the most open minded people a nuke-level migraine headache. see [SuperMinds]